he wont answer the phone at night, am I being played?

Question

We have been talking for a few months now. I work 8-5 m-f and am at his disposal some nights of the week and always on weekends. I always answer the phone for him when I'm at work or with friends and when I cant I call him back shortly or shoot him a text but I have never left him hang there; whereas there have been more than a handful of times when I was left hanging text & call

When we are together we always have fun and go explore new restaurants or just chill in and watch movies. despite all this there is something has always bugged me about him. he is a night owl, is currently laid off and is always with friends but rarely ever answers the phone for me in the evening hours. Sometimes I just want to hear his voice and say good night. I am not particularly a phone person and like texting but sometimes its nice to just SAY I was thinking about you and hear their voice...Ive never been one to talk someones ear off.

Last night was really the last straw for me tho. I wanted to see him after an amazing Friday night together. we were texting on and off all day as we always do, but when I tried to call he declined it. (rang 2x and went to VM) he texted back "sorry I am cooking".... this struck me as funny b/c it is clearly easier to have the phone on your shoulder and talk than using 2 hands to text. 5 minutes later he texted, "I just finished eating and am going to bed, tty tomorrow" it was 9pm on a Saturday (keep in mind this guy is a night owl) when I sent him a text asking him if I could just talk to him he said no. pissed off I texted that I didnt believe him and that he must think I am a fool (yes a bit over the top) but a big part of me felt like I would be a fool to believe that he couldnt talk to me for 1 minute or that he ate a meal that quick.

Am I being over sensitive or should I be reasonably concerned? Should I just move on from this guy or should I check myself??

Answer 1

Well, get ready for my own tale, maybe it can shed some light onto what's happening to you and maybe it won't. Well, lets see... I was 18 at the time, just graduated highschool and met this great girl. She was a few years older than me, was going to a cal state university, and was REAL down to earth. I mean like, she wouldn't care if all I could afford to buy her was a cup of noodles. Anyway, the problem was that she lived too damn far away. I lived about 60 miles from her dorm room and about 55 miles away from her parents house. Opposite direction btw. Anyway, I was seeing her about 3 or 4 times a week, until just one day I got lazy. Didn't show up when I said I would, didn't call to let her know what was up, didn't text. Hell I ever turned off my phone for a few days at a time so I didn't have to read the messages. To my surprise, she thought that she had done something wrong and started to apologize every time I would actually answer, which was very seldom. Eventually, I stopped answering entirely, eventually she stopped calling, eventually she probably starting hating me. I honestly really did care about her and wasn't cheating or messing with other girls at all, just shut her out for no good reason. Looking back on the situation, I honestly don't know what made me do what I did, but I regret it every so often I'll try to look her up or send a message through Facebook hoping that she'll reply, no luck yet and I don't blame her. So ya, not a real answer, but if I'm a typical guy and whatnot, then I guess you can conclude that guys do just cut off girls once or twice in our lives. No reasoning behind it, not trying to be mean or lead you on, but it happens. Don't girls do this type of stuff? Anyway, good luck with your guy, and if he's doing what I described above, just move along.

Answer 2

you seem like you think he needs to be attentive to you on your terms...



stop it...



let him be the aggressor for awhile, if he's "your man" you will find out... you do want to find out right?

Answer 3

who cares? just be happy you have a boyfriend