WHERE DOES IT GO????????????
"Turn out the ight and come to bed"
Them's just the words my missus said,
Oh how I wish I'd done just that,
Cause now I'm loony as a bat.
Turn out the light, I turned the thing,
And then I got to wonderig,
"Where does it go", I blurted out?
"Where does it goes when it goes out"?
"I wouldn't know," the misus said,
"Forget it now and come to bed,"
I turned the blamed thing on again,
and wondered, "now where has it been"?
Cause here it was, so bright once more,
Did it come in the bedroom door?
That's it, I thot, without a doubt,
That's also where the thing went out.
I've solved it now, just used my head,
I'll close the door and go to bed,
I closed the door against the hall,
and turned the switch upon the wall.
The room was dark-- IT COULDN'T BE,
I scratched my head -- now let me see,
the bathroom door, how dumb of me,
I'll close it too and THEN WE'LL SEE.
The room was dark, we'll leave it so,
I closed my eyes and off I go,
To shut the door --what's that you say,
why yet, I see quite well this way.
I banged my knee against a chair,
and fell across the dresser there,
right thru the glass I poked my head,
"WHAT IN THE WORLD," my missus said.
"Relax, my dear, it's only me,
At last I've solved it, don't you see,
I'm merely gonna close the door,
an then it can't come in any more."
I staggered on, I'll do or die,
the door jam smacked me in the eye.
I jerked the door, then let it go.
Good Lord, I've closed in on my toe.
The missus says, "turn on that light,
I'll bet this room's an awful sight."
"Twon't do no good," I said with pride,
"The doors are shut and it's ouside."
"Ill do it then," the missus said,
I heard her getting out of bed,
she took two steps and down she fell.
Then cried aloud, "NOW WHAT THE HELL?"
I bent down quick to help my dear,
the bed post jabbed me in the ear,
I barked my shins against the bed,
"Where is that switch," the missus said?
"Twon't do no good," I tried to shout,
"It can't get in, I've locked it out."
She turned the switch --my uppers jamed,
'IT'S IN AGAIN, well I'll be dammed.
"My God, the mess," the missus cried,
"You broke my mirror, darn your hide,
You/ve gone to far -- I'll call the law,
no, better still, go home to ma."
"Well I'll be dammed," I said again,
"how coud that light have gotten in?"
I started pacing on the floor,
WHY SURE -- THE KEYHOLE IN THE DOOR.
I whittled out some chunks of wood,
and filled both keyholes up real good,
I have you now, my little lark.
I turned lthe switch --THE ROOM WAS DARK.
"it cannot be," I cried in vain.
But wait, WHAT'S THAT --the window pane,
The shade's half up -- SUCCESS AT LAST.
I pulled it down and made it fast.
Then, going slow, so not to fall,
I reached the switch upon the wall.
"I HAVE IT NOW," I said again,
I've locked it out, it can't get in.
I turned the switch, THE LIGHT CAME ON
AS THO THE THING HAD NEVER GONE--
"AHA" I said, with bursting pride,
I'll leave it on and step ouside.
I put my bedroom slippers on
and stood outside upon the lawn,
I SEE IT NOW-- good guess I made.
It's getting out around the shade.
"I should have known," I said again.
Then went and got some two by tens,
and took them in that room so bright.
Then nailed the windows over tight.
Success at last, I'll go to bed
and rest my weary aching head.
I crawled between the sheets so white,
i'M GLAD I SETTLE THAT TONIGHT.
I tossed and turned, NOW WHAT'S AMISS?
Could that damn light be causing this?
It's shining bright, I've fenced it in,
I'd better let it out again.
I ope' the door, and then I shout,
"I've kept you in, now go on out,"
But NOT, IT STAYS, it's stubborn too.
Well, I''ll be darned, now what to do?
AH YES, THE SWITCH, I'll turn it so.
The door is open -- out you go.
And now you're out, I'll close the door
so you can bother me no more
The room is dark-- TOMORROW FAME.
The world will now endear my name.
"I'll turn the switch once more," I said
to just make sure, then go to bed.
I turned the switch, IT'S BACK AGAIN.
Now how the world did it get in.
The windows both are nailed up tight,
the doors are closed,--BUT THERE'S THE LIGHT.
The switch, I thot,-- what does it do?
Is that a pipe the light goes thru?
I'll get my flashlight from the hall
and have a look inside the wall.
I turned the light off once again,
jerked out the switch and looked within.
There's no pipe there that I can see.
But wait --what can these wires be?
I looked the over carefully.
They have no holes, that's plain to see.
No light could get thru them at all.
I nailed the switch back on the wall.
I turned the light switch once again.
The light should have come on right then.
I scratched my aching head once more.
I DIDN'T OPEN UP THE DOOR.
Both doors I opened up real wide,
but still no light came back inside the windows
--SO -- I soon fixed that.
Removed the boards in nothing flat.
I've turned the switch, to no avail.
I've worried till my cheeks are pale.
Please tell me what it's all about.
WHERE DOES IT GO WHEN IT GOES OUT?
Poem written by Willian Hunden